Sex Ed 101
Mysterious Bleeding
I'm hoping for your view on a situation. Backstory: I've been sexually active for 5 years and have only ever been with one partner (and he has only ever been with me.) I am currently on the pill and we always use condoms. The first time we had sex I bled a bit, but haven't ever sine. Yesterday we had sex, and once we finished we noticed a bit of blood. I finished my period a week ago, and we weren't particularly rough (but he did penetrate deeper than usual). I didn't feel pain then, and I haven't felt any pain since we had sex, but I have noticed I've been spotting some blood for the past 24 hours. Should I be concerned about anything, or do you think my partner may just have gone a bit deep, or maybe he scratched me when he fingered me? Not sure if I should worry, or how long I should wait before I go to a doctor.juniejanie | age 20 | March 8, 2010
JamieG says...
He probably scratched you, or caused a minor tear during intercourse; unless the bleeding persists (I'd give it another day or so) or gets worse, you should be fine. And, of course, there's always the possibility that you're just spotting independently from sex.Is Pain Normal?
So, hopefully this isn't a stupid question. The other day things got heavy with my boyfriend and he ended up fingering me. It ended up hurting and I was a little sore afterwards. Is this normal? He is bit older than me and had several other girlfriends before me, so I'm pretty sure he knew what he was doing. Thanks.Sore | age 19 | March 6, 2010
JamieG says...
It's not a stupid question. There are two main possibilities I see for your situation: a lack of proper lubrication, or you not being relaxed enough. Either one of those can cause penetration (whether by fingers, penis, or anything else) to be uncomfortable. I suggest next time adding some lube into the equation, and seeing if that solves the problem.Masturbation Tools
So I'm 17 years old and I have been masturbating for about three years now. However, I am not old enough to purchase a dildo where I live. I am only able to satisfy myself with clitoral stimulation. I cannot orgasm from penetration with fingers (mine or anyone else's) and I don't want to have sex just yet. What can I do or what can I use since I can't get a dildo? Also, what things should I absolutely not use?guilty | March 6, 2010
JamieG says...
First off, most women cannot orgasm from penetration alone, so you're completely normal on that count. I don't know where you live, but in some stores, they sell 'personal massagers' that are essentially vibrators - but since they're not explicitly for sexual purposes, there's no age limit on buying them. Lube is always a good thing as well, and you don't have to be eighteen to buy that, either. I've heard of women masturbating using showerhead massagers and such, as well. As far as things you should absolutely not use... Really, I'm not sure if there are many things that go on that list. Make sure that whatever you're using is clean, to avoid infection. Also, if you're looking to insert anything, make sure that (a) it won't cause suction and (b) it can't break off... because either of those could end up with a rather awkward trip to the emergency room!Tags: masturbation
Birth Control Pills and Pregnancy
I have been on birth control for about a year. I missed the first pill in the second week of my pack but took it as soon as I remembered (about 14 hours later) then took my regularly scheduled pill at the normal time. About 4 days later (about day 13 of my pack) the condom broke during sex. Can I get pregnant even though I only missed one pill?anonymous | age 20 | March 2, 2010
Brittany says...
If you've been taking your pill regularly and on time for the rest of the month, you should be protected. However, if you're worried, you can always take Plan B that you can get at a pharmacy.Tags: pregnancy, sex, condoms, birth control pills, breaking condoms, late birth control pills
Learn to Masturbate
Before my current boyfriend, I had never gone further than kissing. We've got to the point where he's started to finger me. Even though, I find it quite easy to get turned via other means, I don't seem to get anything out of fingering. At best, it's ok, but nothing special. I certainly enjoy the stuff leading up to it a lot more than that. I've tried masturbating myself, but I'm struggling to find anything that feels particularly good. I'm not sure what I can do to improve this.Angelica | age 23 | March 2, 2010
Brittany says...
This might seem like a weird suggestion, but buy some porn - watch a movie, read a magazine, go to a sex shop. A lot of men (and women) completely ignore the clitoris which is similar to the head of the penis - it's where most of the nerves are and where you'll get the best feeling. It's good that you're testing things out by yourself in the bedroom to figure out what you like, too, but definitely communicate with your boyfriend and tell him what feels good and what doesn't. If he's more experienced than you, he might even be able to help you out!Tags: sex, orgasm, masturbation, fingering
Fulfilling Hormones
I'm a teenage girl and my hormones are crazy. I'm getting really... let's say "unfulfilled". How can I make myself satisfied??Anon | age 13 | March 2, 2010
Brittany says...
Masturbate.Tags: hormones, masturbation
Sex and Periods
Thanks for all the great advice throughout the years! I'm in quite a bit of distress... The weekend before last my boyfriend and I had sex. This is one of the first times we had done it and also the first time he actually thrusted a little. He used a condom and was very, very careful. We really only did it for about ten minutes and he never even got close to cumming. We were really just testing the waters since he was thrusting so gently. That Monday I was due to get my period. Now ten days later it is not here yet. I've never been this late before. If I'm late, it's usually only two days or so. I am not on birth control and five days ago I took a pregnancy test that came out negative. I'm still so concerned though. I mean, am I pregnant? Where is my period? Could this all just be coincidence? What's going on?summerblondie | age 16 | March 2, 2010
Brittany says...
Applause to you for being safe and using a condom! You took a pregnancy test after being late, and it came out negative. Generally, that should tell you that you're not pregnant. Sex can be a bit traumatizing for the body and sometimes, it can cause your period to be late when you first start having sex. You could be stressing yourself out over first having sex and especially when your period was a little late, that made it a million times worse. Take another pregnancy test and if it comes back negative - your body is still young, changing, and adjusting, so a period being a little whack once or twice isn't a huge deal.Tags: pregnancy, sex, boyfriend, periods, girlfriend, late period, first time sex
Weird Scents and Things
I have been having this weird smell down there and a lot of like clear stuff come out, too. What is the cause of this? Every time this happens it makes me horny cause it feels like I'm wet down there. Any thoughts? Thanks.... (: | age 15 | March 2, 2010
Brittany says...
Any weird scents (foul, sour, disgusting, fishy, etc.) are signs that something might be wrong - such as a yeast infection. If you're experiencing anything like that, you should go to a doctor to get it checked out. Other than that, it's totally natural and normal to have a little discharge. Some women have more than others, but as long as it's not drastically changing from what your normal is, and it's not itching or causing weird smells, it's completely normal.
So You Can’t Get Pregnant From Oral Sex… Right?
Thought you couldn't get pregnant from swallowing semen during oral sex? Well you're wrong... sort of. An article found its' way into my submission box and it's an interesting read! Check it out: Account of a Girl Impregnanted After Oral Sex Shows Sperms' Incredible Survivability
Now, now, ladies... don't go freaking out what's in your stomach and your boyfriend's potent sperm - read the article, first. Unless you plan on getting into a knife fight after a rendevous with your man, I'll be the first to tell you that you've got nothing to worry about!
Thanks to "whoever" submitted the article! Keep the interesting reads coming!
Whoever | age 22 | February 15, 2010
Tags: pregnancy, blow jobs, sperm, oral sex, articles, abc news
A Lesbian Fantasy
I have been reading about so many girls that have Wondering's problem. I consider myself completely straight, I like penises, I like men's bodies; other people's vaginas and breasts absolutely disgust me. I would never go down on a girl (I would let a girl go down on me though). But I used to have Wondering's exact problem. When it was time for some self love and so on I could only think of lesbian porn. It frustrated me because I just don't like females and this brought on such confusion about my sexuality. I thought maybe I was bi, but I started to really analyze myself and in time reached the conclusion that I'm absolutely not attracted to women. I wanted to cure myself of these fantasies that only popped into my mind when I was horny, and I started to prevent myself from thinking of them. I made myself think of men when I got turned on and watched porn with the focus being men, and to think grossly of women. Well, it worked, my whole desires focused on the men I've always been attracted to. Or it could have all been a phase of mine, that I slowly got over. I don't know, but I'm happy with myself now. That was my experience about the whole thing but I wonder what could be the root for the many girls who are going through the same thing. I think for me it was the early exposure to porn. I first stumbled on erotic stories when I was 12 or 13 by accident, and it just happened to be lesbian erotica. I was absolutely fascinated by the acts described and soon sought out pictures. And from then on all I saw was naked women. And, of course, the porn industry being a man's industry all the focus was on big boobed, plastic women, so it wasn't hard. Even the industries outside porn, commercials, tv shows, magazines, music videos, which all featured scantly-clad women worked for me. At that time I never encountered porn or other media with the focus being on sexy men. Recently, I read some thing that stated that women are being so sexualized everywhere we look, that women are subconsciously picking up the sex messages and the mentality of being turned on by porn-like images of other women and treating other women like sex-objects. Maybe, if it were the men being sexualized so grossly it would be a very different story?Moon89 | age 18 | February 8, 2010
Brittany says...
There are most definitely a variety of reasons that could lead to a woman fantasizing about another woman when she is horny, but it doesn't necessarily mean she's a lesbian, or she's bisexual, or even bi-curious. It's nothing to be ashamed of. Nobody even needs to know, and nobody will know, unless you're telling them, but either way - don't be embarrassed.
Although, I hope that this response helps somebody out and makes some of you feel at ease if you're in this situation. You're not alone!
Tags: sex, porn, fantasies, woman, getting turned on, lesbians