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We Kissed At A Party

There is this guy I like. He came up to me at a party and kissed me, and we went somewhere else and made out. Afterward we danced a bit and when he left he kissed me goodbye and said, "see you at school." At school the Monday after the party he came up to me at my locker and asked me how I was. I was like, "ohh, I'm fine." We had a brief talk about how we were and then he said, "I'll see you around then." The next week I went up to him at his locker and started talking to him about a rumour that was going around about us and he seemed quite uninterested. I don't really know him at all but I really like him and I'm going to a party in a couple of weeks and he'll be going, too. Should I wait until then to make a move? Or is he just not interested in me? I'm worried that if I just wait until the party then nothing will really come of the situation. What should I do?

flola | age 16 | March 9, 2010

Daniel says...

This guy certainly hasn't knocked your socks off with his pursuit of you, so there's no point in going overboard trying to pursue him, either. There's nothing wrong with talking to this guy and maintaining casual communication with him. In fact, I would recommend remaining on friendly terms with him. This can be accomplished relatively easily - with an occasional conversation. Saying hi in the hallway, approaching him at his locker, and just making idle chit-chat from time to time are appropriate ways of doing so. Whatever you do, don't put too much emphasis on starting a spark with this guy right now. First, the harder you try, the more desperate you appear, and the less likely you are to actually win him over. Second, this guy has made it fairly clear that he doesn't want to start a relationship in school.

Don't take it to the bank that you will be able to win this guy over, though. I don't get the vibe that he's terribly interested in you; it may be that he took an opportunity to make out with a cute girl when he had the chance. Notice that he did fulfill his parting words to you - he saw you at school (he even spoke to you). With that said, there's nothing wrong with approaching this guy at the party and saying hi. If he seems more interested in talking to you at the party, it may be worth asking him why he has generally avoided you at school. If you ask this, his answer may provide some window into what is going on in his mind. Just be careful. If he does show an interest in you at the party, it may be convenient interest and not a genuine desire to get to know you better.

Tags: ask a guy, advice, relationships, gauging interest, approaching a guy, parties

Published on March 8, 2010 by Daniel | Read all recent Ask A Guy articles.